Recently I have been thinking a lot about friendship. And my special friendships in particular. I don't have many friends…the real kind I mean. I have plenty of people I am affiliated with, but not many I can call my friend. There should be another word…in between acquaintance and friend…or between friend and soulmate. Post your suggestions if you have any. I can count on one hand the number of special people, who I call friends in my life, and it has been the same number for a few years now. I used to make no effort to find new friends as I was very happy with the ones I had thank you very much. And in some ways, I can't imagine adding another to my group. But don't get me wrong, I like meeting new people and adding someone to my friend's list of facebook, but it tends never to go much deeper than that. When I am away from home, I spend a lot of time evaluating my friendships. And evaluating how I myself do friendship. And to be honest, I have a lot of work to do!
I'm selfish.
This is not the first time I have felt convicted of it, and not the first time it has been pointed out to me. I love Jesus and I want Him to help me in all of my relationships. Psalm 139:23-24 says "Search me O God, and know my heart…See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting". If there is something not quite right in me, I want to know! And not carry on living in a way less than that which was destined for me, before I was even born. So I need to learn to be selfless, to be serving and to be wholeheartedly surrendered to Him. I'm sure my friends would also appreciate this.
I love my friends. I tell them often, in chats and messages. But I want to tell them, I really love them. They are part of my life. They are special people, picked out to be part of my journey. They are vessels God uses when I need a physical shoulder to cry on, they are there to gently remind me when I'm being petulant and ungrateful, they are there to share the joy, laughter and victories we have together in life. I need to take responsibility too. God has also placed me in their lives for a purpose. I want to live out that purpose fully, because I love them, and I know that He knows best.
So friends, you're amazing. A special treasure in my life. I wouldn't be without you. And I'm afraid you're stuck with me now! If you wound me, I'll forgive you. If you let me down, I'll give you a second chance. I am sorry for the times when I put myself before you, but I'm trying to change that. I read a great quote once that said "Friends bring out the best in eachother" and I hope that can be true with us.
"This is the message you have heard from the beginning: We should love one another." 1 John3:11
No comments:
Post a Comment